Why are you a Satanist? And are you a theistic one or atheistic one?
Satan is a very real being to me.
When I finally made contact with Satan after a long time of trying and chickening out, He was the only being Whom I felt completely seen by and utterly not judged by. I felt complete acceptance while looking into this huge beast’s glowing red eyes. He knew everything about me, and thought that it was good. I knew it in my soul.
That was the first time I’d ever been given unconditional love. After that, there was no going back. Nothing will ever compare.
This captures the feeling pretty well. You can maybe feel what I mean at 1:03 onward, though the whole video is important.